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UNDER RECONSTRUCTION; Back tomorrow.
We love the new, the modern, the ephemeral and gloriously disposable as much as anyone, apart from Simon Cowell, but people keep on buying records that were released thirty odd years ago. So, we thought it'd be nice and strangely topical to have a page full of all the old albums that we love.
THE BEATLES: "DOUBLE WHITE" (1968)
Thirty tracks over two albums that managed to incorporate every Beatle incarnation from mop-pops to psychedelic surfers to drug-raddled punkoid squalling, sweet country
maudling and cocky co-ops
of funk rock. It's tempting to
suggest that Double White is
the ultimate Beatles album,
but that's ignoring the very
relevant fact that "She Came
In Through The Bathroom
Window" has one of rocks'
best ever bass lines and it's
on "Abbey Road" and...
"Northern Song" is the only
bit of metal-psychedelia
worth the name and it's on
the "Yellow Submarine" album. The Beatles aren't just an influence, they're a band.
THE KINKS: "CELLULOID HEROES" (1976)
Scattergun pop-shots from all sections of Ray Davies armoury. Pop, rock, music hall, maudlin, sharp, winsome, wayward, cynical and sweetly optimistic. The original Kinks album and, in many ways, one of the few 'band' albums from them rather than Ray bossing Dave.
GUNS N' ROSES: "APPETITE FOR
DESTRUCTION" (1987)
A debut album and in that context even
more of a stunner than it actually is, if you
know what I mean, and you do, I can tell.
To old people like me listening to the
collapse of Led Zep via a Lynyrd Skynyrd
infection was a deliciously guilty delight,
but to people who were young then and
people who are young now, Guns N'
Roses represent real rock n roll
iconography, imagery and style and one
that boasts a huge, swaggering, near
perfect rock n roll soundtrack for the last
of the true dinosaur rock bands. At the
time of recording Guns ' Roses were still a collection of booze-drugged fans, albeit fans who could outstrip their heroes, put the torch to their influences and run giggling into their own bonfire.
THE DARKNESS: "PERMISSION TO LAND" (2003)
Hardly five years old and hardly, you might think, retro, but then you'll listen to it. We had the first demo from The Darkness and I (you'd have done the same) wrote it off as a "Sleek rock beast with comedy vox". The kids went nuts, The Darkness went mega, Justin passed my son for backstage and fucked me off. The Darkness went more mega and quite possibly because "Permission To Land" and the unashamedly retro-rawk wig-outs of their tour(s) glam-slammed the coolest of critics into dribbling incoherence with their big riffed rock pantomime.
T.REX: "THE SLIDER" (1972)
A schizophrenic beast of an album
that references Bolan's trippy-hippy
acoustic phase with sparse, but
wickedly picked stuff like
"Ballrooms Of Mars" as well as
rock-god rampaging through Chuck
Berrys' wake with cocksure cock
rock like "Telegram Sam". Now we
don't like to waste words or time
so... It's tempting to suggest that
"The Slider" is the ultimate T.Rex
album, but that's ignoring the very
relevant fact that "Get It On" has
one of rocks' best ever bass lines
and it's on "Electric Warrior" and...
"Venus Loon" is a metal-gum
pop-riot of an anthem to
necrophilia and it's on the "Zinc
Alloy & The Hidden Riders Of
Tomorrow - A Creamed Cage In
August" album. T.Rex aren't just an
influence, they're Marc Bolan, oh,
and Chuck Berry.
LED ZEPELLIN: "HOUSES OF THE HOLY" (1973)
According to the Wikipedia entry this is the album that "was a stylistic turing point" where Led Zepellin ditched the blues and moved onto a "less overt form of mysticism". Like, whatever man. "Houses Of The Holy" was the Led Zepelin album that suddenly made me understand what older friends had been banging on about while spilling blackcurrant & cider down the sheets of hair n grease they called
coats. "Houses Of The Holy" is a potent and steely mix of prog, metal and, sorry, Wikipedia, blues and one that dresses the stage for the awesome and impressive excess of the following "Physical Grafitti". That's opinion, what is fact is that kids who weren't born when "Houses..." was released are knocking around in school bands, playing "Whole Lotta Love" and sharping around record shops, picking up Led Zepellin back catalougue, which is one way of acknowledging class while skipping it...
JIMI HENDRIX EXPERIENCE: "ARE YOU EXPERIENCED?" (1967)
It's not just the guitar genius. Jimi Hendrix could also write and arrange stunning rock songs. Arguably the single best example of a rock album that combines free wheeling experimentalism with lean, tight structures. I don't care who you are, what you do, like or loathe, if you haven't got this one, you've got nothing.
DEEP PURPLE: "MACHINE HEAD" (1972)
Every single person on this arse-wanked planet can play the "Smoke On The Water" riff on anything. Not just on any musical instrument, anything, any-fucking
- thing. North Korean
goon-squad cops can
and will, with unusual
joy, play the "Smoke"
riff on the nearest
suspect with a cattle
prod and while
"Smoke On The
Water" isn't the best
track in the world it
does intro a
surprisingly flash, slick
and simply raw riff that everyone can and everyone wants to play. Even so, it's the substantial body of greasy blues metal like "Space Truckin'" that anchors Deep Purple the band and "Machine Head" the album into the brain.
BOB DYLAN: "DESIRE" (1976)
For kids who'd previously associated Mr Dylan with 60's tedium like "Blowin' In The Wind" and insipid folk cafes, it was "Hurricane" from the "Desire" album that opened a clear, wholesomely violent n strident line back through the lukewarm likes of Low, Palace Brothers and the endless trail of half-hearted copyists to... well, nothing except "Desire". This is the generation-spanning Dylan album that ties the sixties to the noughties with braids of universal steel. On this one, Bob Dylan learnt to upstage, rather than repeat himself.
ALICE COOPER: "BILLION DOLLAR BABIES" (1973)
Yeah, we know that ole Alice had trawled around for years, doing mersey-beat knock-offs before stumbling on the whole snake n make up routine, but in 1973 Alice Cooper were a band and 90% of this album was co-written, only 100% of it was accidentally brilliant. We say 'accidentally' because Alice Cooper created a faux-glam beast that needed feeding and "Billion Dollar Babies" turned into ther main course. To this day, American candidates use "Elected" for a soundtrack, without a shred of awareness and "I Love The Dead" runs a dumb-ass rule over anything that Cohen, Cage or Cave have to say about death.
THE SEX PISTOLS: "NEVER MIND THE BOLLOCKS" (1977)
According to lazy persons research tool, Wikipedia, Rolling Stone magazine described "Bollocks" as "subway trains crashing together under four feet of mud, victims screaming". Cool and accurate and as much as The Sex Pistols were McClaren's punky boy band, and as much as they imploded pretty sharpish, they still beat The Clash when it comes to gut-churning, adrenalin injection. If this is the soundtrack for a rock n roll swindle, it's peerless.
Can we get some sauce for these?
Hallo, I'm Marc Bolan
Hallo, I'm Marc Bolan
Hallo, we're Led Zepellin
Hallo, I'm very Richie Blackmore
Me too!